I have been wondering how some women seem to do it all and not lose their minds. I know in my case it seems to take every last bit of energy I have to work outside of the house full time, be a full time mom to a kid who needs 24/7 direction and redirection, be a halfway decent spouse, run the errands, cook, clean, laundry, and pet keeper. That doesn’t include running the household calendar of appointments for a special needs kid and husband. I am lucky if I remember to put mascara on one eye before I have to shove the kid on the bus, grab my coffee, forget my lunch on the counter and get out the door every morning.
I see these posts on social media websites where women post as their status message a whole diatribe on why they are making the ultimate sacrifice and go unnoticed by the world because they chose to be stay at home moms. Sorry, but while you have a full day of other things to do after the kids get off to school, remember, some of US work full time and fit those things in. You aren’t superwomen, you are bad time managers. Oh, you have to take your 4 kids to 12 different activities in 3 days? Who the hell signed them up for their young over scheduled lives? Gosh, this really is rant #1. Oh well, things can only go up from here.
The daily struggle of, am I doing enough for my kid is really mind numbing. Is he getting the right support at school? Is he getting enough positive encouragement in addition to a disciplined behavioral component at home as well as school? Do I think his meds are working well enough, is he over/under medicated? Is it time to change meds? Is his therapy helping him learn coping skills? Do I see any improvement in his ability to self-regulate? Is that outburst I just saw normal or is it an early sign of Bi-polar? I wonder why I have trouble sleeping? Gee, I cannot begin to imagine why!
The capper to all of this is that I have recently moved 3000 miles away from friends and family, a gals best support system. Well, truth be told I was already 250 miles away, but at least that was only a 4 hour car ride and an easy escape for a weekend now and again.
When we moved from Jersey to Virginia, it didn’t take me long to find an angel of a friend. We met as most moms of 4 year olds do, through our kids. I made more friends as the 6 years went by in Virginia, but it was slow going. Why, you may ask? Well when you work full time, etc etc etc, see above rant, it doesn’t leave much time for socializing. Now that we are out here, I have yet to make 10 minutes to do any of that, and know no one. There are no, hey honey, think I’m driving up to Jersey this weekend times. I am hoping that the parent support group through my son’s new specialized school opens up some opportunity on that road. Now to schedule some time to get a meeting. That is life’s next big hurdle.